ENJOYING THE DISAPPOINTMENT
Back in November I wrote about being back at Murrayfield Ice Rink (now renamed Murrayfield Ice Arena) and being able to watch 'our' team again, the Edinburgh Capitals. I wrote about the sense of belonging, and the return of those old feelings of hope and disappointment that came with being a Caps fan. Now I write, a few hours before the final match of the league season, about how disappointing last night was. And how much I savour that sense of disappointment.
Four months ago we were watching a team that was largely comprised of ageing veterans and inexperienced teenagers. A team playing it's first home match because, up until then, they'd had no ice to call home. Who'd had to cross the water over to Mordor (aka Fife) for their first training sessions. Who'd played all their early league matches on away rinks. Who'd had their first home match postponed due to technical issues, so that their first experience of skating out on Murrayfield's ice would be to play the league leaders. (In front of a far bigger crowd than many of our youngsters had encountered before, which they initially found quite daunting.) It was good to be back, good to have a team to support, and there were no great expectations.
If, back then, you'd have told me that we were going to finish second in the league, and that we'd be in the hunt for the league title until the final few minutes of the second last match, on the final weekend, I'd have bitten your hand off. I don't think I'd have believed you. Why raise such unrealistic hopes? But here I am, feeling disappointed that the team couldn't quite manage it. And savouring that disappointment.
Because to be disappointed you have to have had hope. Which is something this team have given us. Back in 2018, when we were last able to watch the Caps perform, 'hope' was largely defined as "let's hope we don't get totally gubbed this weekend". The standard of hockey might be a bit lower than it was back then, but the standard of hope has been raised considerably. A few weeks ago we were in a position where, if we won all our remaining league matches we'd be champions. That hope was fully kindled when Barbara and I travelled up to Aberdeen and watched our guys beat Lynx, those aforementioned league leaders. Then we lost to that same Lynx at home. But hope returned, as both teams, went on a losing streak, and suddenly the outcome of the season came down to one more game up in the north east. So important a match that Aberdeen even put on a live stream, for the first time in SNL history. And hope burst into life when we took an early lead. Only to be dashed in the closing moments, as we went down to a 3-2 loss. A deflating moment, yes, but this morning I can enjoy my disappointment.
Tonight the Caps play North Ayrshire Wild, a team who've only won two games all season. It's now a meaningless fixture, in terms of league positions, but it's still hockey, it's another chance to cheer on our team and enjoy the spectacle. It will, hopefully, bring another big crowd to Freezerfield, and the size and passion of the support has been another big surprise of the season, with numbers exceeding fifteen hundred at times. It will be fun.
It's not quite the end either. The final league positions are used to determine the seeding for the end of season playoffs, and Caps will have a quarter final against Kilmarnock Thunder. Win that, and we'll be into the Playoffs Weekend, being held at Murrayfield on 8th and 9th of April. Another chance to win some silverware. Another chance to hope. And maybe, this time, skip that sense of disappointment...?
